Adoption-- it means many things to many different people. But in my case, it defines the greatest journey and a few of the greatest accomplishments of my life. To adopt you must be wholeheartedly open to whatever may come your way and that is scary. But it forces you to have great faith-- an amazing life lesson.
I cannot imagine loving anyone or anything as much as my children. I cannot imagine missing out on the blessing of having them in my life-- makes me a little sick to think about it. Because they are my. Entire. Life.
I would encourage anyone thinking about adoption to research and take advantage of talking with anyone who has done it! I can tell you that more than likely, you will be immensely blessed. It is funny because people always tell us, "Your kids are so lucky." But we always dispute that and we know that we are the lucky ones.
Many people are hesitant about adoption because there are a lot of misconceptions. One dominant one is that the birthmother is going to come take the baby back. Fostered, I'm sure, by Lifetime movies (which I happen to partake in occasionally). But we learned through our journey that most birthmothers are not drug-addicted low-lifes, for lack of a better term. They are people in bad situations who want the best for their baby.
Nick and I have the utmost respect and admiration for our children's birthmothers, as they were so selfless in "giving up" their babies in hopes that they may have better lives. How mature is that? Not sure that I could do it.
Many people also believe that there may only be certain types/races of babies available-- also not true. Our two children are different races, different sexes, and both were healthy at birth. I will say here that we did not stipulate anything as far as what we wanted in a child.
There isn't anything wrong with doing that, we just didn't. We felt that God knew a little bit better than we did, what we needed. And boy did He!
Another major misconception is that you have to go international to adopt. Please don't misinterpret this, we have many friends that have adopted overseas, and that is AMAZING! Our hearts were just here. There is so much of a need here in the United States-- it is unbelievable.
One of my friends, Jenny, brought up the point that maybe people don't realize the need here because we don't have physical buildings called "orphanages." But there is still great need.
You may be hesitant about adoption, not because of misconceptions, but because of your own feelings. Some people are embarrassed to feel the things that they feel when thinking about adoption, and they would never express them out loud-- but they are NORMAL!
Will I love this child as my own?
Will my friends/family accept this child?
Will I have issues with the birthparents?
What will people think of me?
And to all of these I will say that it all works out above and beyond your expectations. You may have to grow a little thicker skin, but it is so worth it!
Another friend of mine, Robin, and I were talking, and we were discussing the fact that adoption is becoming more common. She commented, "God is not playing with this generation as far as taking care of the orphans and widows," referring to James 1:27. I have to agree-- He is placing adoption on the hearts of many in our generation. If you are one of them-- DO IT!!
This blogging thing is new to me, and it may seem a bit jumbled... but all that I can offer is my experience. I hope that it helps others in this crazy walk.
If you or someone that you know is considering adoption, please send me a comment! Ask me questions, use me!!!!!